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Hi!

Stupid Ovary...

Just documenting this more for my OWN purposes than anything else.

Brad and I saw each other this weekend after a few weeks apart. DTD of course, and like last time I...bled a little.  Could possibly consider CM watery and eggwhite.  Ovary is KILLING ME TODAY.  Ouch, ouch, ouch.  Throbby, dull.  Boobs not sore.  Sorta crampy down there before ovary started hurting in the afternoon. 

That is all.

I'll Prove It!

We all know the feeling.  We are going to start our diets on "Monday."  We are going to start working out as soon as we aren't sick/have time/get new workout clothes/get a gym membership.

Nike may have said it best, but I think Brad and I say it better. 

Nike:  Just Do It.

Brad and April:  Go Nazi.

Either way you put it, it's a short way of saying "Suck it up and do this thing 100% without excuses."  Now, since my New Year's resolutions, and my "Making Babies Plan of Action" I've done pretty darn good.  Aside from the occassional weekend treat - I've been sticking to a diet that mainly consists of portion control.  Gee - like THAT'S hard with the Lap-Band...LOL!  Like I will have ONE Fresco Taco instead of 12.  Or HALF a tuna sandwich on flourless organic bread instead of Subway.

But it is still not making a difference, and I know EXACTLY why.

CARBS!

Yes, my friends.  Carbs.  If you're like me - you try to get around it by doing stuff like "Weight Watchers" or "LA Weight Loss" or "Nutri System."  Which is FINE for people without PCOS.  But if you are insulin resistant - I'm sorry.  We HAVE to suck it up and realize that our stupid bodies can't handle it, and that getting pregnant and losing weight DEPENDS on us not eating carbs like we usually do.  These diet plans allow for actually - a LOT of carbohydrates.  If we are being honest with ourselves, we know that this just won't work as well as the alternative.

So here's my plan.  I am going to PROVE to you, myself, and other women with PCOS that with a strict diet rich in water intake, vegetables, nuts, chicken, fish, & healthy fats, and very low in carbohydrates, red meat, soy, & sugar - I will literally just MELT the fat away.  To me, it seems VERY hard...as I always seem to have a reason, or a need to CHEAT, or stop the diet.  But I am going to document it!!  WITH PICTURES! AND VIDEOS!  And it will be awesome. 

Do you ever read all the things you are supposed to eat and do, and say "Heck yes! I am going to do it!" Then end up only half-assing it?  That's the story of my life.  I've only whole-assed it once, and I lost 20lbs in 20 days. 

5 Week Challenge
Goal:  Lose at least 10, but up to 25lbs.  (2 pounds/week is generally "safe" for those who need to lose a little weight, however for obese or morbidly obese people, losing more per week is okay according to my doctor.)

 - NO metformin.  Bleh!
 - 1000-1200 calories/day.
 - 30 full minutes of cardio 4 times per week. (Plus 5 min warm up.)
 - Under 20 carbs per day for 2 weeks. (Atkins Induction)
 - NO soda of any kind.
 - At least 80oz of water daily. (Take your weight, divide by two.  Drink this amount in ounces.)
 - NO caffeine.
 - NO soy.
 - NO artificial sugars other than Splenda.
 - At least 60-80 grams protein/day.
 - Low dairy intake - (usually I load up on cheese, sour cream, cream cheese, half&half, etc... while on a low carb diet, but I am going to limit this as the "Making Babies Plan of Action" suggests.)

Supplies:
- A gun.  Just in case...because this is going to make me want to kill myself. 
- A camera.  I will document my journey and the final result will be awesome!

Each day I will post a menu, which might get redundant and I'm sorry if it does.  But I can do whatever the heck I want on my own blog!!! HAHAHA!  I will also probably post some suicidal thoughts and ideas on what my life would be like with sugar in it.  *daydream*

I am currently still on Week 5 of the C25K, (trying to make up for being sick.)  But I'm doing well and did a 13 minute mile!! WOO!  I also did two miles in 29:20.  Don't laugh!!!  It was hard!  I wish I were 6'2" *sigh* 

Then and Now

I suppose it's probably beneficial to my mental health to gauge how far I've come rather than bash my self-esteem and complain about how bad I'm doing right NOW.

I've decided that I want to get to 143lbs exactly for now.  I would still be in the "overweight" category but that means I will have lost 100lbs.  100 FREAKING POUNDS on a girl who is only 5'2"!!!  Wouldn't that be cool if I could say "Oh, I lost 100lbs."  Yeah.  It would be. 

Highest weight: 243lbs ("Morbidly obese")
Lowest Weight: 184.4lbs ("Obese")
Current Weight: 190.2lbs (Still "obese")
2010 Goal: 160lbs (Puts me in the "overweight" category, and out of the "obese" category.)
Just Because Goal: 143lbs (At the lower end of the "overweight" category.)
"Healthy Weight" Goal: 130lbs (Puts me in the "healthy weight" range for my BMI.)

This was me....um...BEFORE. *barfs*  I think I was 225-230 here.  It's SO weird because I did NOT feel that big at all.  I mean - we won't go into the things I could and couldn't reach on my own body at this point...but MAN, you never realize it...

  This was me sometime during summer 2009.

This was me...uhh...like Fall 2009. Not much different.  I think I was just wearing bigger pants.

This is me today. I actually WEIGH more than I did in Fall 2009.  But with all the cardio I'm getting a little more toned.  I look kinda weirdly pregnant in the side photo.  Meh.

So there you have it. Since Brad and I don't live in the same town right now, it's obviously pointless to be charting, doing ovulation tests, etc... Therefore (and this post is coming soon) I am working on MYSELF. Sucking it up and realizing that I have PCOS and infertility because I am TOO FAT. That's it. I need to realize it. Anyone who is TTC with PCOS and is overweight also needs to realize it.  Taking tons of pills, injecting ourselves, etc...etc... isn't the FIRST thing we need to be doing.  We need to get to a healthier weight first.  It sucks, but it's a simple idea that only requires one thing - DISCIPLINE! 

Sorry for the angry rough-talk.  It's just that when you KNOW what you need to do, yet lack the will and strength to do it, it gets frustrating.  It's not like I'm laying on the couch eating cake all day (okay like 1% of the time I will do that...) but I'm not Going Nazi or anything.

And that is my next post.  :D

Updates!! Lots and Lots of Updates!

How could I, APRIL of all people, NOT blog for almost a whole month here?

Well, because nothing exciting has happened! LOL!!!  To sum it up, I've been working out, but eating a lot, therefore I am STILL bouncing around at 189 - 192 lbs.  While I DO have the Lap-Band, it doesn't prevent head hunger...and frankly that might be the only reason I ever eat anything.  I'm proud that all my working out has paid off and definitely made me stronger, and more toned.  I've noticed a HUGE difference in the size of my tummy from doing all this cardio!!  But I seriously need to re-think my diet or I will NEVER lose any weight. *frustrated* 

I am NOT taking any metformin or pretnatal vitamins (just regular gummies), and to tell you the truth it's kind of nice!  My "digestive" system doesn't bother me...I'm regular...(no metformin diarrhea, yay!) And I don't really notice a difference not taking the prenatals vs. a gummy.  The gummies have folic acid too - so I might just use those instead. Chewing pills with the Lap-Band is GROSS!

I'm AM super excited that I had a PERIOD on my own January 18th. I think I've had a total of 5 - 10 periods my entire life that were "natural" and not induced with birth control or some sort of fertility med.

I've been doing the "Couch to 5K Running Program" - and it's pretty much the best thing I've ever done!!  It's starts you off slowly, and gradually builds up your running ability.  It was relatively challenging at first, then became easy as the first week wore on.  I wanted to do MORE running, but the program says to avoid straining yourself.  I went from running a mile in like 16 minutes, to running a mile in 14:30.  I realize most people could WALK that - but I have short legs! And I jog at 4.0 MPH, and run at 5.0 MPH.  When I used to run, I would push way too hard, hurt my knees, then stop working out. This gradually gets you up to a good pace, and it certainly has for ME! I LOVE running!



For three solid weeks I worked out almost daily for 30 minutes a day!  THEN I GOT SICK.  I've been sick for 11 flippin' days - but I feel like I'm getting a little better.  I've been coughing up my left lung basically, so that's why I'm hesitant to start again.  But I need to, or else I will have to start all over!!!

Bradley was watching Oprah the other day (you just have to know my husband to realize this is normal) and they were discussing PCOS. It's the leading cause of infertility in America - and 90% of people with PCOS can reverse and stop the effects with diet and exercise. Furthermore, they discussed how exercise does more than just make you fit… apparently your muscles have the ability to treat insulin differently when they are stronger and being utilized. Instead of becoming resistant to the insulin (causing PCOS), your body learns to use the produced insulin. Therefore making your ovaries work. Apparently.

People place so much emphasis on eating right while trying to get pregnant with PCOS. (Or get pregnant in general.) Low carbs, lots of protein, no soy, etc...etc... (which is STILL way important) but we rarely hear about the benefits of getting LOTS of exercise.

I don’t mean strolling a mile or two each day (though that is better than nothing…). I’m talking about challenging cardio, muscle toning Pilates, yoga…

Honestly, I was scared to workout while actively trying to conceive. The last thing I want is my uterus bouncing all around while spermie and egg are trying to embrace. So I took it slow and easy. I also didn’t want to miscarry all over the yoga mat while doing ab crunches.

Now it’s different. Since we’re working on our bodies it’s much easier to push myself, make myself stronger, and not worry about anything else. If my body is strong and healthy, the baby will be too.

I went to the maternity store with my friend and put on the "fake" belly they have in the dressing room.  If anything will motivate me to LOSE WEIGHT before getting pregnant - this is it.  I looked like a complete COW!!!  *sigh*  I really DO want to be CUTE and pregnant so I can take tons of pictures - especially afer the baby is born.  There will be so many snapshot flying around at that time - I need to look like a MILF!

My goal before going on any fertility meds, or trying again is to be 160lbs.  That's still a good 30lbs, but if I REALLY push myself I bet I could get there by May. 

Bradley and I have decided that he is going to get a semen analysis as soon as possible, and I might get an HSG.  Is that where they put the dye in your uterus to see if your tubes are blocked?  That's what I want.  LOL!  We think it's better just to rule out anything before we continue. 

Wish me ~~~~*~*~*~~*~**Baby Dust~~~~***~****~*~*~*~*~***~**~

What The...

So randomly leftie (ovary) started hurting Thursday or Friday, right about the same time my boobs started getting sore.  I figured it was nothing...maybe I was going to OVULATE!  Or maybe since I haven't ovulated since back in like....October?...that it was a cyst rupturing.   (Because frankly, it was hurting pretty bad.  )But by the time Friday rolled around, leftie was REALLY hurtin'.  Not keel over and die....but it was noticeable for sure. 

I checked my CM...nothing really.  Saturday, Sunday, and today my boobs have been SO sore though!  I checked my cervix - low and firm.  But then....this morning...I saw a little blood.  What the heck?  I know you bleed a little before ovulation, but this was DEFINITELY not before O as I was dry and my cervix wasn't in the appropriate position. 

So after hubby and I BD'd - there was a LOT of blood!  Like...first day of your period kind...(well, mine is semi-light the first day.)  So I am COMPLETELY confused. 

So....I have no idea what could have happened.  My luteal phase is 13 days without fail.  So if today is day one of my cycle...then that means I O'd on, the 4th?  the 5th?  No clue.  So why was leftie hurting??? 


*sigh*

Well...we'll see what happens!

Update Week 2: 3 Pounds Lost, 31 to go!

So this is starting into the second week of sticking to the "Making Babies Plan of Action" and I've already lost 3lbs!  Of course, it was really hard for the first three days - then it got much easier.  Here are the things I've been eating! (Keep in mind I have the lap-band too, so I only am able to eat about 1/2 cup to 1 cup of food at a time.  So the portions are small.)

 - Shrimp, chicken, beef, and salmon.  In various ways.
 - Broccoli, cauliflower, bell peppers, onions...in various ways.
 - Dreamfields Pasta. (The kind with only 5g net carbs per serving.)  The hubby and I split a SINGLE pasta serving because when you mix it with meat and vegetables, it's actually quite a lot. 

*Many have reported mixed reviews of Dreamfields Pasta and whether or not it actually is low carb.  My personal opinion is that if you eat the pasta ALONE without protein or vegetables, it will cause more of a spike in blood sugar than eating with something else of substance. This is based on reports I've heard of blood sugar spikes after eating the pasta alone, and no blood sugar spikes after eating the pasta with protien.*

 - Hard boiled eggs, deviled eggs made with sour cream instead of mayo.
 - Tuna by the can.
 - Pecans candied with Splenda and cinnamon.
 - Fajitas with low carb tortillas.

I bought a whole bunch of Atkins breakfast shakes - my FAVE diet breakfast!  But alas...they are full of soy protien which is a huge no-no for PCOSers.  So I had to let hubby have those and eat an egg instead.

I allowed myself one cheat meal where I had two slices of pizza.  Which was totally worth it.  My main problem is working out. Or lack thereof.  I only worked out ONCE to P90X last week and was sore for two days.  This week my main goal is to workout THREE TIMES.  That's it!  For now anyway.  Next week I will start the "Couch to 5K Running Program."

My goal is to lose 2 lbs per week.  This should get me to my current goal of 159lbs (to be under 160 and in the "overweight" range) by May 2nd.  Which will be PERFECT because I have the Casual Blogger Conference on May 28th, my BFF's wedding on June 13th, and my OTHER BFF's wedding on July 17th!  I will be so hot and in awesome shape by then!

My "Making Babies Plan of Action"

I recently have read a book titled “Making Babies” A Three Month Program for Maximum Fertility. Let me tell you, I’m not a reader…but I finished this book cover to cover in one sitting.

The basis of the book covers five different “body types” that women and men are characterized into with regard to their fertility. Then, it gives a three month “prescription” for how to manage each type. So many people are diagnosed with “unexplained infertility” and go on to try things like IVF before they even realize what their body is doing!

So my plan is to follow the “Making Babies Action Plan” perfectly for three months (or longer probably.)

The reason I felt the need to do something MORE than just take Clomid and BD is because I ovulated three months in a row, and didn’t get pregnant. This obviously could be a few things… I may have blocked tubes, a bad lining, hubby could have a low sperm count. The point is, I used to only think that I needed to ovulate in order to get pregnant, but there are so many other things that come into play.

In the book they describe five body types. They are titled Pale, Stuck, Tired, Dry, and Waterlogged. They give detailed checklists that allow you to easily determine which type you are. Here’s a very brief description of each type. (For women only.)

Tired: Slow metabolism, hypothyroidism, lethargic, overweight, perspire easily, crave carbs, bruise easily, low libido. Low progesterone levels. Period is heavy but short.

Dry: Experience night sweats, dry eyes, skin, hair, or nails, feel hot, wake up during the night, often thirsty, hard dry bowl movements, easily flushed, thin, restless and fidgety, little cervical mucus.

Stuck: Irritable, tense, stressed, long thing bowel movements, pebble like bowl movements, painful periods, mood swings, PMS, endometriosis, irregular periods, very heavy period, very light period, sawtooth pattern on BBT chart.

Pale: Face and lips are pale, gets dizzy easily, trouble falling asleep, feels shaky, light period, short period, late ovulation, long luteal phase.

Waterlogged: Trouble controlling weight, swollen hands and feet, feels tired, achy joints, feel bloated, yeast infections, endometriosis, PCOS, painful periods with mucus and clots, experience clear CM throughout cycle, erratic BBT.

By taking the tests on each type, I determined that I am DEFINITELY Waterlogged with a little bit of Stuck thrown in. Often times they say that people are a combination of TWO different types.

My Waterlogged Symptoms

Trouble controlling weight
Swollen hands and feet
Feel bloated
I have PCOS
Painful periods with mucus and clots
Clear copious cervical mucus throughout cycle
BBT varies from month to month
BBT forms a jagged sawtooth pattern, changing almost daily by.3 degrees or more (sometimes)
Anovulation
Ovulation unpredictably on a different day each cycle
BBT doesn’t change much after ovulation
BBT rises slowly after ovulation

My Stuck Symptoms

I feel better with exercise
I have cold hands and feet
Discomfort, cramps, and pain with period
Sore boobs premenstrually and also at ovulation
I have PMS
Irregular periods
Period is dark red or brown and clotted
BBT takes a few days to rise after LH surge
BBT is unstable and unpredictable

So what now? A PLAN and PRESCRIPTION for what I need to do for the next three months! The plans for each body type are SO different, I can’t believe that people generalize diet and nutrition so much. This plan will briefly go over what I need to do. In the book they explain why and how each thing affects your fertility, which is amazingly useful. But I’ll just summarize here.

Rx for the Waterlogged Body Type

Food: High in protein (30%), low in complex carbs (20%), lots of fruits and veggies (50%). Nutrient rich “green” foods. Whole grains. Avoid fluctuation blood sugar levels as much as possible. Eat barley. Green tea (I don’t drink tea, but for those who do…) Avoid all dairy products aside from yogurt.

HYDRATE! Ironically, waterlogged people tend to be dehydrated and therefore retain fluids.

To Avoid: Overeating, raw or cold foods, greasy foods and rich cream sauces, spicy foods, alcohol, dairy products made with cow’s milk, processed foods, sugar and artificial sweetener, yeast, fungi, mold, excessive salt, pork, fatty beef, saturated fats, soy, flaxseeds, yams.

About Soy and PCOS: (Not in the book.) Many PCOSers know that taking Soy Isoflavones just like you would take Clomid has the same effect! Clomid binds to the estrogen receptors in your body making you produce more estrogen at the right time in your cycle. But, unbeknownst to many, Soy also does the same thing! They are called phytoestrogens. Therefore it stands to reason that if your eating soy at random times throughout your cycle, it is royally messing up your hormones! This includes products, not just food. 60% of what you put ON your body is absorbed INTO the body. I took a look around my house, and I was slathering myself with lotion that had soy in it, drinking soy protein drinks, and even spritzing my hair with soy based leave-in conditioner! No wonder my hormones are out of whack!

Exercise: Is vitally important. 30 minutes of aerobic activity per day.

Lifestyle: Keep the environment mold free.

Supplements: Chromium, probiotics.

Rx for the Stuck Body Type

I’ll only follow the parts of this regimen that coincides with the Waterlogged type, or the bold items, since that’s more “me.” But here are the basics of this plan.

Food: Whole unprocessed foods. 60% fruits and veggies, 30% complex carbs, 10% protein. Lots of fiber, especially during phase 4 of the cycle during implantation. Cruciferous veggies like broccoli. Essential fatty acids like evening primrose oil, especially during phase 4 of the cycle. Calcium rich foods. (Or supplements in my case.) Plenty of vitamin D. Nautrally sour foods like citrus, pickles, vinegar for liver function (limited, but still necessary. A little goes a long way.)

Avoid: Overeating, eating on the run or while upset, large or frequent servings of red meat, products treated with hormones, caffeine, coffee (decaf or regular), (both of which inhibit implantation and are not recommended for any type), salty food and hard cheeses, fried and fatty foods, dairy products, alcohol.

Exercise: Get regular moderate exercise that increases blood flow. Do lighter exercise during menstruation. Walk, do yoga. Lighter workouts that last longer. Don’t swim in cold water.

Lifestyle: (I'm not a very "stressed" person in general, but it wouldn't hurt to...) Reduce stress, laugh, breathe deeply. Use pads not tampons (which impede blood flow).

Supplements: Zinc, Vitamin B Complex, Megnesium, Calcium, evening primrose oil, red raspberry leaf, low dose aspirin once per day (which is good for anyone TTC, but espcically good for Stuck types.)

I will report on how it's going, and give detailed stats regularly!  I hope this can help others too!